The Furriest Blog You'll Ever Read

Android goes big!

2011-02-03T22:53:00.001-08:00

Well it sure has been a long time since I have last blogged. Almost a year to be exact..lol. I feel most of my blogs start of this way because I rarely blog on a consistent basis. Well that may all be changing now. Mainly because google has officially released the blogger blogspot app to be able to blog from your android device. It is very clean cut and feature rich! Very impressed by it. I may begin to start blogging again now that I can do it on my ever so accessable phone! Crazy to think that its now inconvient to get on my pc. Slowly but surely my phone is going to allow me to do everything that I need!

Til next time...peace!

.25Back Legacy

2010-02-08T20:05:00.001-08:00

I have said it times and times again. THE SUPERBOWL IS ONE GAME!!!! Judging a mans legacy on how he performed on one game, how does this make sense? The fact that manning unlike bradshaw, aikman, and montana..no longer can say he didnt lose a superbowl. Does that matter when you are detirmining whos the best ever? NO!! Last time i checked it takes a team to win a superbowl. Not just one man..a QB. Last time i checked if michael jordan didnt have scottie pippen, and all his supporting cast...he wouldnt have won the rings. For goodness sakes, it drives me up a wall to see all these so called "knowledgeable" sports analysts say that Mannning Choked and lost the game for the colts. IT IS A TEAM GAME PEOPLE! Garcon Dropped a crucial pass on 3rd down. What about Baskett and him not recovering the onside kick? Both plays can arguably be the plays that changed the game around...before the Manning INT. Honestly had garcon caught the ball or baskett recovered the onside kick...manning may not have been in the situation to have to be throwing to convert on a 3rd down to wayne. So to put this blame on manning and say his legacy took a stunt growth or ...a fall. You have to be foolish.

Okay manning has put up and broken more records than any other QB in the league. Total overall in his career including post season games. He has the best Win to Loss record at this point in his career than any other QB. Hes won 4 MVPs. Hes won the "big game" and the Mvp to go with that. Hes broken records that others before him set faster than anyone else has at this point. My point being...winning a superbowl is a team stat. It takes a team effort to win the SB. Manning can only control what he can. He consistantly has lead the league in MVPS, pass yrds, completions, wins, games played, touchdowns....if you are gonna judge his "legacy" than stack his stats up against any other QB and then we'll see who the best is. Manning led the Colts to 7 Comeback 4th qrter wins...the most in the history of reg season(once again another one of the records)...After this season there's no way you could still call manning a choke artist. The colts may have lost a lot of the big games ...but not one man in peyton manning lost the game singlehandlely..........

The colts got outplayed last night at the superbowl. Manning didnt have a bad game on paper..what 31-45 333 yrds 1 TD 1 INT. As a team the colts made mistakes and the saints capitatlized and also threw in some trick plays to take the game away. I would bet very good money to say(and im not a betting man) that if the colts and saints rematched next sunday that the result/numbers would be switched. THe colts are the better team..just not on the night of the superbowl. Manning is the best QB in the nfl right now and when he is retired he will be the best ever. IF anything from this COlts lost they shouldnt be saying "well manning can no longer be considerred as the best ever" what they should be saying is "Altough the colts won the most reg season games in this past decade the team of the decade of the 2000s has to be the patriots or steelers based off of how many championsihps they won as a team...you can't be the team of the decade if you only when one championship" The fact that the COLTS didnt win more than one SB is not an accurate stat to see how well manning stacks up against other QBS. If you wanna compare mannings TDS, Yrds, Comp % to someone elses..then sure...but when you start comparing superbowl titles...you have to take into account the entire team.

Manning still stands tall in the history of QBS...Top 3 and def above brady, aikman, bradshaw...But the Colts can't claim that Team of the 2000's decade title like the 49ers in the 80s, Cowboys in the 90s....the won a lot of Reg season games, but like i said to be considered as the team of the decade you gotta win more rings...

Superbowl wins=Defines if you are the team of the decade

Passing yrds, TDS, Winning, Records set at the QB Position, MVPS, Completion %= Defines Who is the best QB ever

New year and a New Decade

2010-01-01T12:25:00.000-08:00

Man its crazy to think that its a new decade today, let alone a new year. I've noticed a lot of peoples facebook status's say .."glad this year is long and gone" or "ready to put this year far out of mind"..things like that. Eh i dont look at it like that at all. 2009 Was actually really rough...but it reaped far more blessings than hardships. Hmm lets take it look...

Postive things out of 2009

Biggest Blessing Ever..Raegan Chloe Furry..June 9th. Had a baby girl. The best thing that could ever happen to you. Its not easy ..but the happiness it brings is unimaginable. I thought i was being responsible getting married and living on my own..paying the bills, and all that. But having a baby, makes Your world stop and you gotta think about someone else before yourself. Even on the days when you feel like wanting to go into a room by yourself and not talking to everyone..Well those days are over. Just when you think you got it all together paying debt off, paying bills, working all the time and trying to find date nights with your wife. Throwing in a baby to the mix..that'll rock your world..but its so worth it. I lvoe my baby girl. Shes the best and worth everything.
Started our own Business. Kind of a "on the side" thing right now. And actually one of my goals for 2010 is to make it more of a full time thing. But we started a photography business in August. Our Goal was to try to do at least one photoshoot a month. Turns out from august-december we did a total of at least 7 that i can count of. Which exceeded our expectations. Its really been a fun ride so far. We just enjoy taking pictures..so its a fun service we provide for people. Check out our blog.. www.jafurtography.blogspot.com
This very well could of been very negative part of the year, and at the time it looked like it was..but I got laid off and filed unemployment. But turns out it was a blessing because i ended up finding a better paying/better benefits job. So it turned out to be a blessing
We paid 4 ...yes 4 credit cards off. Huuuugge blessing. Actaully from a financial standpoint in 2009 we never missed a monthly payment or past due on any bills of 2009. I praise the Lord for that. He really blessed us financially in 2009. When it could of been a train wreck wiht me losing my job..it turned out being a huge blessing. And we are saving our money that mu;ch more..so we can get closer to buying a house here in Indy.
I got to get a lot closer with my wifes side of the family. Most people would read that and be like....why is that postive ? LOL..It really is though..they are great people, and i couldnt of asked for any better in laws. Amber's Dad is one of the few examples of people in my life that i can say actually demonstrate what it is like to be a True Christian. Showed me a lot this year.
My Goal was to lose 40 pounds starting in August by the end of the year. I lost 26 pounds..Although far from my goal, i was still happy to have lost nearly 30 pounds! Thanks to my wife for all of the support

Goals for 2010

Get more involved with Church and meeting new people. Ive always thrived on meeting new people. 2009 i really didnt meet a lot of new people. 2009 I also think i found out who my real friends are. So a big goal is to get involved at church and with God. Meet some new people..hold on to the old friends who matter most.
Be the best father i can be to my little girl..and a better husband to my wife
Continune to do the "snowball" effect paying ccards and student loads off. Oh the hope for one day not having to worry about having any bills but just have to worry about living expenses. Thats more towards to the student loan aspect than the ccards. Because i reallize i chose to use ccards.
Get my weight down to what it was senior year of highschool.
Expand our J & A Furtography Business to where it can continue to grow and be effective or possibly make it our "job" and neither of us need to have other jobs..
Get an even better paying job. Im gonna start my search this first week of the new year. Im being hopefully that something huge will come my way.

So there ya have it. 2009 was a blessed year...a year i will never take for granted. It started off really rough ...depressing...agrivating...But ended postive...happy..and hopeful.

2000s ..Decades Top 22 Moments

(some positive, some negative..but all big events none the left to remember..in order by year)

9/11(2001)
Started taking church and God more serious(2005)
Went on a mission trip to Arizona(2005)
I joined Facebook...if you had asked me in 2005 if it would be that big.i would of said..pssh not!..but now look at it! (2005)
Mission Trip to Chicago/Wisconsin(2005)
Started Playing Guitar(2005)
Went with Brent to the Game that Reggie Millers Jersey Got Retired(2006)
BCM Ridgecrest(2006)
Started at Circuit City(2006)
Moved out on my own(2006)
Attended first Colts Game, even though i wanted to go for like 8 years before this! LOL(2007)
Colts win the superbowl(2007)
Ceder Point Road Trip(2007)
got engaged(2007)
First time in an airplane(2007)
got married(2008)
Saw the ocean in FL for the first time(2008)
Went to disney world for the first time(2008)
Laid off at Circuit City, Hired at T-mobile(2009)
Had a Baby (2009)
Started own business J & A Furtography(2009)
Grandma Ellen Goes to be with the Lord(2009)

I thought about adding this one but thought id get made fun of for being to nerdy..Got my Skill level 50/General In Halo 3(2008)..hopefully most people wont know what that means..LOL

MAN IT WAS A BUSY DECADE LOL!!

Heres to a new decade and a new year! What will it bring..I have not a stinkin' clue because if you had asked me if thats how my life would pan out ten years ago..i would of laughed at you!

Im out

`J Dog

From 14-0 to 14-1 The fall of the perfect season...

2009-12-27T20:46:00.001-08:00

So what is my spin on the Colts decsision on NOT going for a 16-0 season? Let me first say that i am and will always be a colts fan. One of the biggest if nnot the biggest fans you'll live to know. So before i say anything please do not put me into the category of colts fans that everyone is learing to dislike after booing today. so with that said..

1) Play the dang starters man...History has shown that we SUCK when we sit poeple. And against the jets our Offense wasnt exactly gellin'..against the jets...ill say it again ..our offense wasnt gelling ..AGAINST THE JETS. So why in the world as a coach would i feel like it was okay for my offense to come out. Until you can score a passing td with the best QB to ever play the game...then sorry no benching for you. Now with the colts having a bye week. The colts probably wont see action until Jan 17th or later. So we are okay with not letting our offense play an ENTIRE game thru..and expect them to come back for the playoff game and play at a championship level? It will be almnost a month before they had played an ENTIRE COMPETITIVE game..A game with a passion to win...We just gonna toss the towel in on this one too boys?

2) Caldwell, i lost a lot of respect for you. Although this was a tough choice to make, i am sorry you made the wrong one. At least pull them when we were up by enough. Being at the game and it being 15-10 you definetely didnt feel like the game was over with..and it obviously was not. So why the crap did you pull the starters? And i do not want to hear to keep the guys healthy.. THATS CRAP.. manning wasn't touched all game...not even really close honestly. You honestly were okay with giving the jets the game and throwing history out the window? Why did you even try to win the game against the Jags on Thursday then? Makes no sense. You got booed because you mis-led the fans. If we werent goin for a so called undefeated year ..the starters should of been benched a game ago. Thanks for leading us on though.. honestly you did this at home?! Couldnt this have waited until in buffallo next week when it could of possibly been to cold to play manning anyways? Why at home of all places would you want to throw in the towel. The fans pay to see the team win...i paid a lot o fmoney to go to this game to see my teams coach just literally gave up.

3)Jets fans ..Talk all the stinkin trash you want. You are bad and will have your butt handed to you in the playoffs. You ended our streak..but can you honestly feel good about beeating 4th string people? Honestly? If you take pride in that...well thats just pathetic..whatever..We will see you in the playoffs...maybe.

4) Going for an undefeated season DOES mean something..In the nfl to win 16 games without losing..that is saying something. Any given sunday a terrible team can win. The best team does not always win the superbowl. Theres a lot of luck and chance inolved in getting to the superbowl. Its hard to say that there is a lot of luck and chance involved of winning 16 games in a row. Actaully none at all because anyone can win 1 game...not everyone can win 16 in a row without losing. If the colts go onto win the superbowl this year...a fan of the Colts or someone who follows them avidly like myself will always remember this was the year we won it all, but could of went 19-0...but instead the colts decided to sit the starters. Theres no debate here, its true..people will remember the ring more..but the not being able to win it all and do the perfect season will be remembered just as much..anyone that truely calls themself a colt or nfl fan will remember it for sure..

5) I want it to be known..i went to this game..I never booed, i was disgustted by how caldwell decided to play this out..but i certanly never booed painter. i feel sorry for the guy ..its not his fault. THe stadium immedaitely emptied after he was put in..ill have it known that i never left, i sat thru it all. You have to pay your respect to the team that you follow. It was disgusting the Class that all of the colt BANDWAGON(i said it) fans put on today..The colts found out who their true fans were today...was i super ticked at how caldwell handled this..? yes...But you cannot take it out on the team!

Part of me feels like something has been taken away from me...I cant imagine what the palyers feel ..and how will that pan out in the long run come playoff time? Will they have the same desires to win..like they would of when they were 14-0?

Everyone can say whatever the crap they want to about colts fans and class and all that. Don't put me in that category because trust me i was just as disgusted as everyone else was that the fans booed. I also though was ticked that caldwell did what he did. As a fan all i gotta say is this better pay off ..or i dont know what.

Well i guess ill be getting my hair cut off here this week then because in week 3 or 4 i told amber i wasn't cutting my hair until the colts lost or won the superbowl. I thought for sur the superbowl would come first...Guess i was wrong

Cmon Colts..lets regroup and move on !

Something that needs to be said..

2009-10-21T19:01:00.001-07:00

Its been a while since i blogged last. But I have got something ive been wanting to blog about for quite sometime, i've just not done it. But now i Just can't take it anymore.

What is the Deal with People Updating their facebook and twitter status's with COMPLAINTS AND WHINING. ?? I mean i see stuff like.. the drive thru is taking so long..FML...or Just randomly little things that everyone is like screw my life, i hate my life. This or that pisses me off.

Well you know what ticks me off...How much facebook nowadays has turned into WHINEBOOK. I have been on facebook since 2005, long before they even had the status updates. Way before twitter was ever thought of. Then i got into the whole updating your status and seeing what others were up to. Very rarely did people complain...Now? i would say 90% of peoples status updates are whining about something. i have so much homework.....okay so why are you wasting time putting that on facebook instead of doing your homework? I am so sick ..throwing up so much...okay well why arent you in bed resting? Not only do most people post it once..but usually within 3 or 4 hours. They talk about the same ISSUE!

If you are my friend on facebook or twitter, you know that i update my status quite frequently. Most of my status's contain either what i am doing, or if football is on, i constantly do post things about different plays that go on. IFF...IFF ...If i post anything that is negative you will never see me say Screw my life, FML, or whatever crap. THINGS ARE NOT THAT BAD!!!!! Okay look i have been through a lot of stuff in my life. Things ALWAYS get brighter..I have been through a parental divorce, growing up in poverty, that first big breakup, health issues, getting laid off, unplanned pregancy(which the baby is the biggest blessing ever by the way =)....and for goodness sakes...I work retail so i have had to deal with peoples crap for nearly 4 yrs now.., i have been through it all. But life is way to valuable. If you want to say something thats obvious like..Road Construction stinks!..I dont have a problem with that..but to say that "road constration **** stinks, why does this always have to happen to me, my life sucks..yadda yadda.." Ill be honest...I do not want to read that. When i read facebook status updates, it seems like the are always big downers. Kinda puts you in a bad mood. Because in my head im just like..is it really that bad?? seriously? I mean there is always that one person that has it so worse than you. Should road Construction tick you off so much that you have to go on a cussing tangent on your status update? What about the guy that may have a family of 5, gets hit by a drunk driver and is in critical condition. ...knowing that...how big really are your problems now?

Maybe i just need to take people off my friends list that always update with negative status updates? I dont know. All i know is, i hate reading everyones status updates that are so nnegative. God has blessed us with each breath, and with a life worth living. Will you had bad days ? Yes...I have them too. Things don't go your way or like you planned. Do i get upset and ticked off? yes...would i post "i hate road construction"? Yes, probably have at some point. But i will never EVER go off the deep in and post FML, my life sucks because of this or that. LIFE IS NOT THAT BAD. It has its ups and downs, BUT IT IS NOT THAT BAD. Life goes goood in those ups...in those downs...you can control if you stay postive or negative..human nature is to be negative, but how much better of a place would this be if everyone always stayed postive and realized that hey, its really not that bad?

I realize, that i am "whining" in this blog. And it could contradict what i say. But this is to prove the point. I know im not the only one that feels this way.

I challenge everyone that reads this to put one postive thing on my facbeook wall that is going on in your life, or leave a comment on the blog. Because i would love to see some of the positive stuff that is going on in everyone's life.

Welp, Im peacing out for now! Night all!

Jon

Busy Busy Busy

2009-08-29T20:02:00.000-07:00

God has been doing some good things in my life lately. Hmm where do I start? Well as far as my job goes at T-mobile, business is finally starting to pick up. Ive only worked there since May 15th, and for the month of July i lead my store in Total Features. And so far for this month of august(only a few days left) I'm leading my store in total number of activations/new customers. Which this is nice. Working at circuit city for 3 years definetly helped me understand sales so that i could step right in to the job and be on top of the board. Jobs been great. We had a guy put his 2 weeks in, so I have been working as a part timer but getting 35-40 hrs for the whole month of august which is definetly nice. I am loving the hours, but at the same time im finding it hard to find the time that i want to spend with raegan and amber. I basically worked 10 out of a 11 days in a row, i had 3 days off, and right now im currently in the mid of working another 7 days in a row. Thats rough when you got a family, and need to find the time to spend with them. So im happy im getting all these hours and stuff, but at the same time im trying to find something where i know i will have the same days off each week, and something that im not working like 10 days in a row with a few days off and then back to the same thing over again. We'll see what happens, and see where God takes me. Ive been applying to a ton of places, actually pretty much since i got the job, just to see if i could better myself, but we'll see.

In other news, Amber and I have started our "hobby" photography sessions on the side. We at the moment are just taking like senior, engagement, couples, familys, and other types of pictures on the side. I have been working on a blog and a website. Ordered us some business cards, and we have been getting the ball rolling..We've actually all ready had one photo shoot in terre haute, and it went great! We are in the process of doing the editing on the pictures, but so far everything turned out great! We are naming ourselves "Jon & Amber Furtography". I came up with the name because i thought it was clever! Our last names are Furry, so why not take Fur and tography and put them together. Instead of PHotography, its Furtography. ITs catchy and it will catch peoples eyes and ears. We are excited, things are picking up for it. After we did the one senior session. We have had several people contact us to set up appointments with them. Amber and I would love to hav ethis end up being like our full time jobs. Where we would do all sorts of photography and run our own business. We're startin small and seeing where God will take us! In the meantime, go check out our blog: www.jafurtography.blogspot.com

Hmm what else? My Baby girl is so beautiful. SHe is truely a blessing. She makes my heart melt everytime, she smiles and everything. I hope i can just help her to devlope into a Godly woman. I am enjoying all the time that i can get to spend with her beacuse she is growing so dang fast!

Football is about to start, whcih im stoked about! GO COLTS! and...Halo 3 ODST is being released in Sept.! I am so excited for yet another amazing halo video game!

Hmm well that is all for now, im off! Gotta work open to close tomorrow..

L8R!

Jon

Time Flies on by...Taking things for granted

2009-07-15T21:21:00.000-07:00

So i have been thinking a lot this past week about tons of things, but i just come to realize to not beat myself up on stuff. I really want so much for my wife and baby girl that sometimes i stress myself out that i dont do enough for them. I wish i could build them a house or a place to go hide when they need to hide or play when they need to play. I think this is just an internal struggle i will always try to defeat to support my family. I am so blessed with everything, but sometimes i get wrapped up in so much stress that i forget to sit back and realize actually how great it is to breathe another moment with teh women in my life. Ive learned that not to take it for granted as it can be taken away at any moment. I hate getting down or feeling as though i dont do enough ..or nothing i do is helping out or right. Ive been mixed with those emotions as well as looking on facebook at some of my old friends. Once again as i have before..reflecting how ...how the times have changed. Its crazy. Time goes so fast, and ive noticed i thought that before having a baby time flew, but i cant seem to grasp the concept of time since Raegan has been here. I mean shoot shes all ready a month old. I can't beleive that. I was looking at some old pictures and i cant get over where everyone is at now ...and how each month, day and second built everyone into the person we are today. People have "grown up" and moved away from terre haute, and things are just changing. God has blessed me with a great group of people, and i hope he continues to pour out blessings on everyone. Its an encouragment seeing people i grew up with or remember hanging out with blossom into mature adults. Its a blessing...also it makes me feel old lol. I Hope i can continue to turn into a great father and husband. I fail every day but pray every day that God gives me the wisdom and power to keep going on. Having a baby girl makes me want to strive to be her superhero...Im beginning to cry as i type this, so this is my cue to head to bed. I love my God, I love my Wife, I love my Raegan. God is so good to me, why do i always just take it for granted?

Raegan Chloe is here!! June 9, 2009

2009-06-22T21:46:00.000-07:00

It is crazy to think that i was so frustrated one year ago with life that it was just overwhelming. It seems just like yesturday i remember feeling run dry and tired..and to much routine. But man things have changed...Having a baby is the most amazing feeling to have. I am so scarred that i am not going to be a great dad, but im slowly learning, and ill be learning even when shes 25. Raegan has brought so much joy to my life its unexplainable. I really did think i had it all figured out...and what love is. But i had no clue...Love has been shown to me on June 9th 2009. It all started with the labor and pre birth. THe 12 hrs before my daughter was born was the hardest ours ive had in a long time. My wife was in so much pain...and nothing i could do about it. And for those husbands that truely love their wives, you know how much this feeling sucks. You feel like you are useless. And the whole helping my wife breath thru the birthing process, and just seeing the birth process, and the end result. It is just an overwhelming joy. It brought me and my wife closer, and now we have the best gift ever. Amber does a great job with her, but i feel like i still am struggling. Hopefully this will come second nature. I truely thought i knew what love was...and now its awhole new meaning and enlightenement to me.

I was talking to amber the other day and i was like sweetie do you realize my life went from 0 responsibilites to all that you can encounter in life in less than 3 years? In 2006, i was still living at home with my mother with no job or license. In the end of 2006 i got a license and a job at circuit city. Step one of .."growing up" In 2007, i move out on my own and pay my own rent and bills...and then i started dating Amber. 2008, i married the love of my life Amber. Within two years got a license, a job, moved out on my own, got married. And then in 2009, had a baby girl Raegan Chloe. So in the matter of less than 3 years ive some how accomplished to pick of all possible responsibilities of life...Husband and father. I am blessed to be where i am. I didnt expect to be 22 and married with a kid when i was in high school, but i sure as heck don't wish it were any different! Life has gone so fast in the last 3 years!

As far as goals and stuff going on lately, Being a father to Ragean is priority and will be forever now. Ive been working at T-mobile since may 15th. Love the job, hate the drive.. But honestly it depends on the day. The last week i saw quite the array of different sunsets and clouds...that reminded me of God's Uniqueness. Ive also been working on eating healthier so i can lower my blood pressure and just lose weight. I have noticed in the 4 days since ive started..eating healthier is hard, but once you do start, you realize how badly you were eating before..and when you eat those unhealthy foods..they arent as good as they use to be. Im beginning..to not like pop as much. I hadnt had pop for a week or so and then tonight i had a coke from mcdees because tomorrow we are starting a biggest loser within our household between all of us..so i was kinda eating the last big supper out..and i noticed after not having coke for a week, i really didnt like the taste of it. It wasnt bad..but i kept thinking..man how did i drink this all the time? So im working on getting in better shape, ive let it slide to long..and with the help of my family, and praying for God's strength i think that i can overcome this landslide.

I tell you i am just so much happier out of terre haute. Spiritually, Physically, Mentally. ANd honestly its not like we go out and do something in Indy every night. Yeah ...we have the option to(whcih at least having the option may be one reason why im happier here). And yes i do miss my family a lot, but this move was just for the better. Amber is happier and sees God at work again, and that makes me happy. We've got a few choices of awesome churches wevve been attending, which is helping spiritually get refocused. Terre Haute for us was just draining on so many subjects that it was bringing us down. Mix that in with the fact that there wasn't much to do there..and it was rough for us. I have really enjoyed getting close with amber's family and her brother and stuff. Her dad is a great example of what Jesus wants us to be. He does it all for the Lord too. and i apperciate them so much. It helps to have that type of influence in your life. Whcih i hope i can be to raegan and anyone that incounters me. I use to look at life as a mission field..in everything, then life thru some curve balls at me and i lost track of that, but i have been regaining it once again.

man im glad God didnt give up on me when i gave up on him......Just like raegan..theres sometimes you can't stop her crying..and she just cries her self to sleep...you have to as a father watch that...it hurts to see her crying and nothing i can do...but she can fall asleep because im there comforting her...sometimes you just gotta let them cry..thats probably what God thinks sometimes about us when we doubt him or "give up " on him.."sometimes they just gotta cry theres nothing i can do...but they will be able to sleep(get thru life) because they know i love them and hold them close to my heart".I love him, hes kind of a big deal....Raegan shows me God like i've never thought of God Before...

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord

2009-05-14T11:56:00.000-07:00

So i yet again haven't blogged for a long time, but my wife insist that i make a habit of it. We'll see :-P. Life is good, i have been unemployed since the beginning of march, but life has never been better! I know that losing the job was what i needed, i am so much happier now. We are living in Indy right now, right near avon. We moved in with amber's parents, and honestly it has been such a blessing, i love her family they are the greatest. Her dad is one of few people/men, that i feel like actually lives the way that Jesus intended christians to live. He has been a great example and i now see what i missed out on as a child. So i am cherishing these times we are living with them and learning something new every day.

Well within hte last few months ive unloaded and loaded probably about 10 trucks worth of moving stuff. We got everyone moved into this nice new relaxing house and things are going great. We just got plugged into a church of 4,000 Plus. And i can say for the first time in a year and a half im beginning to focus on God totally with my heart and mind. I see the beauty in things again, and im not constantly looking negatively at stuff. I knew he would bring me from the deep deep valley that i was in, and he delivered me. I kept praying that lats year and a half,...and waiting..and finally redemption. "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord"

In about 3 weeks or less, honestly any time now. I WILL BE A DAD! I am sccccccaaaaarrrreed to death, but so excited and i pray for my baby every day. I hope that i can be a great dad. That is something i worry about since i never had a physical father really there at all. We are going to name her Raegan Chloe Furry, Raegan means spiritual blessing/strength...we named her that because in this last year life has been really really rough, but its only by God's Strength we made it thru and we wanted a name that would remind us to always stay spiritually strong when times get rough.

I got a job this week at TMobile as a sales rep, which will pay me more hourly than i made at circuit city plus commission. I am excited and thrilled for the oppurtunity. The only thing negative i can forsee out of this job, would be the 45 MIn Drive there and 45 min drive back, but maybe that will be my time to focus on the Lord and pray more often. God knows what hes doing so we shall see.

God is good, and if you are going through anything..KNOW..he is there and he loves you...I dont understand...why he lets things happen sometimes, but he will be pull you up...and you will be stronger because of it. Ive been through divorce, no father, losing a job, unplanned pregnancies, ive been through it all. BUT EVERY time...even when i doubt and dont think he will....he holds me in his arms and he takes care of me EVERY TIME..Sometimes it takes 30 seconds..Sometimes it takes 30 days..or 3 years. But he takes care of me, and he will take care of you.

OUttie 9,000

6 Months later....

2009-01-15T18:48:00.000-08:00

It sure has been awhile since ive blogged. Half a year?...thats crazy that its been that long, it seems just like yesturday when i typed some blogs up. Its crazy the older that you do get, the faster time does seem to go.

6 Months later, and not really a whole lot has changed in some areas and in others big surprises. Like i have a child on the way. A baby girl actually, we just found that out this past tuesday. Its crazy amber is just over 5 months pregnant. I all ready feel like i dont have time to really do much, but that is going to intesify times 20 in 4 months. I am excited though, i really am. I've been run down with life and i am ready for a life changing experience. I think God gives us the gift of a family so that it can rejuvenate us of our youth. I miss being young. No bills, no worries, no hassle. Life was simple. I've tried to live the same way, but it just doesn't work out. Somehow life has its way of stressing you out. You feel like you've got everything planned out and finally it just crumbles. I know a lot of people say its just God is testing you and wanting you to take a leap of faith, but i am seriously done with these tests! I hate being so young and all ready getting so jerked around in life ...and not being able to stay positive.It always got me when an elder couple were always so negative ..just because life has taken their toll...I said id never be like that...but i am sure on my way.

So in the next few days(tomorrow probably) I will find out if for the first time in 2 and a half years if i will be out of a job. Circuit city is being put up in an auction, and if we don't get a buyer then we must begin to liquidate and go out of business. I really don't know what is going to happen, but last friday when i clocked in for my shift and found out that we had to have somethign done before the 16th or we would be going out of business. It was devestating. I am so sick of having the worst turn of events in life. I swear....amber and I have been thru so much together its not even funny. Its almost like what else could go wrong....or whats next? ....She loses her job ...(and well yeah dont get me started on that one)...right before we get married. Then on our wedding day ...we literally swam to it pretty much in the flood...and it didnt go nearly as planned as we wanted it to. And now...with a Kid on the way...I have a big chance that in two days ill know if i will have a job or not...C"MON! are you kidding me?!?! I am sick of it.....throw me a bone here.

So i've been frustrated and...just thinking ..a lot..whats the point? If nothing ever works in life then why even try some times. Its frustrating. I was scared to death to be a father...but now im scared to death that ...im probably losing my job and nothing i could control...and now im goin to be a father. I wish that, i had all the money in the world .....to just help anyone that needed money just because. I wish i had a job in the world that ....i didnt have to worry about if the company would be here or not from month to month. Really theres no job that is secure. I just wish i had no worries ....so that it would block me from enjoying my life again. I still have hope though. Hope is on its way...and she doesnt have a name yet, we're disucssing that still, but hope is on the way. Hope for fun family together...no matter what the financial situation..God will take care of us...Hope for a future with amber and my baby girl on the way.

So no matter what i find out when i clock into work in the morning...whether i have a job or whether i find out when the company is closing down...no matter which it is, i still have hope, and i still have a rejuvenating life experience waiting for me down the road. God will take care of me and my family. Even though most things in life arent for sure, i know thats one thing that is for sure.

Well heres to another 6 months...or whenever i blog next..

Ive Paid my Dues

2008-08-17T15:16:00.000-07:00

Well this is different, im at home off from work and amber went in at 3. I've worked well over 50 hrs this week and finally get the do nothing today, its great. Got to love back to school time of the year. Busy as heck, and we are short staffed. It was exactly like this last year as well. Really short staffed and really busy. Due to recent events at work there is a full time spot open over in HE which is on a bonus plan unlike where i am now. So i could be making an additional $500-1000 a month depending on how well i would meet budgets. There is supposedly an interview process, but I know i won't get the position beacuse even though im top in sells and bust my butt, you have to really kiss you know what. Basically heres the whole story summed up. Ive worked here almost 2 yrs and anytime i apply to get moved up, something always ends up screwing me over. Ive more than paid my dues to that place, but i know i wont get rewarded. I never get any of the job promotions. Seems as if I have to work my butt off to get anything where as other people are handed stuff left and right. Not gonna lie it makes me jealous, sometimes i wish i had things easy like other people. My Dad never has been existent so ive never had help from him, and my mom has had it rough and had to raise me and my sister and had not a lot of money to help out. So everything that I own I've busted my butt for. It sucks though because i work any where from 37-45 hrs a week and bust my butt, try to do my job to the best of my ability and still don't have enough to help pay off the student loans and stuff. Im not a slacker either i do my job right and go 110%, anyone who really knows me..knows that when it comes to work i dont slack. I know i slack at cleanin up the house and chores and stuff, Amber doesnt enjoy that. Ive helped a lot more though since we got married. I Just wish that something would swing me and ambers way ..but that never happens.

Right now im in the stage of life where ..everyday i wake up its just frustrating to have to go to work literally everyday and not have it mount to a lot. As soon as i get off work, typically working an all day shift like 11-11 or 9:45 to 7 or 8...you get home and then ...no one ever wants to hang out late, and theres nothin to do in Terre Haute so you just relax a little and then go to bed and do it all over again. Its very depressing and frustrating. Last week, I had a few friends over, but they were all gone by midnight. That just kinda stunk because i was looking to just hang out on end, and everyone used the "i gotta go to work" or "im tired". It was discouraging, when i work too, and im busy too, but i wanted to hang out and everyone just left. I had to work the next day as well even....9:45 to 9 ...but i was willing to hang out til 2 or 3 or whatever. The night was a blast don't get me wrong.I just hate the fact that like i said I get up and go to work every day and work pretty much an all day shift then come home and no one is willing to hang out like we use to. We had so many long nights at the BCM house or out at Matt's. I mean its not like im expecting every night for us to all hang out and every night for us to all stay up until 4 and then go to work at 6 or 7 or whatever time it is we have to go in. Just occasinally, stay up late...i remember a lot of the times in the BCM house or out at matt's parents house we got to the point where ...yeah there wasnt a lot to talk about, but it was just the mere fact we were hanging out and building the friendships. They always joke that when you get married life changes and no more freedom. Everyone got married, or got engaged, or got a job and now apparently we are all to old to hang out late lol. All im saying is im up for hanging out whenver and however late.

Im Burn out, and fed up with terre haute because theres nothing to do.

Fall Season

2008-08-11T21:05:00.000-07:00

The last few days has been great. About tops maybe 78 outside and sunny with blue skies. I love this kind of weather. Its kind of odd to see it this soon in august but hey im not complaining. Im ready for it to stay like this though. Cooler Weather..Football..It seems as i enjoy this coming season the best, because your not miserable and sweaty and youre not freezing youre buns off. Theres a few things to look foward going on into the fall season too like...football season. Its going to be great this year. So many unending season story lines that ill like to follow...for instance...How well will the colts do? What will the packers end up looking like after making the choice to trade farve? How will farve play? Will the patriots go undefeated or will they be stopped. Never have i ever been this excited i think for football season to come. Expecting the unexpected, thats for sure. Like last season when the Pats went 18-1 only to lose to a manning in the super bowl. Other things to look foward to like Chris and Molly's wedding. It will be fun to be in it, but it will be just as exciting to see two great friends yet again get married.

Ever since i got back from my honeymoon with my wife, work has been a lot more enjoyable for me. See ive worked at the same place for two years coming this novemeber. And my honeymoon was the first time i had actually taken a vacation away. It wore me down and made me hate my job. But here recently ive been enjoying it again, although working some crazy hours here more recently has stunk. Overal its been enjoyable again and ive been selling like i use to sell when i first started. Ive decided that every so often , that i get my Paid time Off Saved up, im going to take a small vacation unless i know that Amber and I will be taking a bigger vacation some where which in that case ill save it up to do that. But as soon as i hit 40 hrs paid time off, im going to definetly be taking a week away again soon. Thats what hurt me the first time. Is never taking time off to get away. It eventually will get to you and eat away at you..i mean cmon it is retail we're talking about here :).

Well anyways, i need to be hitting the hay i gotta get some sleep before work in the mornin'.

Update on Life Situations

2008-08-11T10:13:00.000-07:00

Well of course we decided to stay here in the haute for now, because no jobs were popping up for either Amber or I. So we stayed here with me at least having a full time job and with her still looking. Well the bills were getting kinda tight because i was the only one working. We lived off 3 months of savings and paid a $2300 credit card off...so it wasn't like we were hurting that bad. So we toughed it out all the meanwhile continuing to getting more random charges sent to us. Like apprently when amber lost her job..the insurance company she had health insurance didnt finish paying off what was left. WHich i would of thought it would have been paid all in full in the beginning but whatever. So in the middle of me the only one working and trying to live off of 3 months savings...we got like a $500 hospital bill. OUCH. Well we set up a payment plan for that, and kept on job searchin. AMber finally did get a job over at the olive garden, plus she got her substitute teacher licesnse. So we'll see what happens. It stinks though because expesnes just keep racking up,...for instance..we just had to purchase auto insurance. theres $325 down the drown. On Wednesday, i have to go to the license branch to get the title switched to my name for my car and also get new plates. THeres at least another $100. Then i just got our electric bill which we normally pay $46 because we are on budget billing.....the way that works...they basically give you a set rate you pay and then when that year is up you have to pay the difference or if you over paid you get money back. Well its teh end of the year and guess what ....in the mail today we got an Electric bill for like $500 that is due before august 28th. I freaking hate money.

Pictures of Life(Long..sorry)

2008-07-30T21:04:00.000-07:00

These are some of the most memorable moments in my life within the last four years. I have just really been thinking a lot about all the memories in the last few years that i had. It pretty much all started through BCM though. Most of my friendships were grown through bcm to a much deeper level. Fresh out of highschool i really didnt have much going for me. I was just a graduate planning on going to school for a degree i had no clue for. I did have one thing though. I had an accountablitity group with Andrew Wheaton and Matt Eyler, which to this day was a big reason for the person that i am today. We'd meet and talk about "God topics" and hold each other accountable to be a better rep for Christ. WHich that ultimately spring boarded us to BCM. Where i made tons of relationships.

Man do i miss the times of going to bcm as a freshman and listening to tufo lead worship in such a breath taking way, and going to IHOP and just staying up late. At this point in my life my main people i hung out with was andrew and matt. Well it slowly became a very close friendship with matt. We helped each other through problems for a good year or at least 8 months. Relationships, and other issues. It brought us really close. Nothing ever really happened between us but Space just began with time..creating itself. But i had some of the best times with matt ever. Endless amounts of parties. We set a few records...every thursday night we had a party at his house for probably 4 months straight. and at one piont we also had a Halo 2 lan party at his house every friday night for probably 2 months straight as well as most sundays too. Bcm on tuesdays..Mt pleasant on sundays(sunday school and church) and then joey anders and all of us halo gamers off to matts for lan parties and swiiming parties. Of course we stopped by tacbo bell nearly ever sunday for lunch. Oh i miss those days.

As time went on, still making tons of friendships and bonds through bcm. I became really close with Shadrach at the same time of spending a lot of time with matt. Well eventually because i got so close to both, it was hard to make time for the both so i started making us all 3 hang out. It turned out we all cliched well together. But yes i did have some hliarous times with shadrach. Shadrach and I would hang out super late and do random things in walmart. and just be silliy in general. We slowing became best buds. WEll like i said the three of us started to become the known late nighters. We're talking wed stay up til 4 or 5 every night at the bcm house or matts. Slowly steph goodman became a part of this group. ANd we became the late night owls of BCM.

Of course BCM, all the memores just hanging out with TUFO singing worship songs while he played guitar or just talking late nights about issues and life. The mission trips...the retreats...the friendships. also during this time i began to start to get really close with a really good buddy ...corey cross..he would come over and we would just play tons of halo together.....and just talk ....THis is year one...just great memories...also met who is now my wife amber furry(gentry) this year at bcm. this was tons of fun this year because i had no job and no responsiblies so i could just hang out and not have to worry about anything..

Year went on...Summer was tons of fun because most of everyone stayed in terre haute or lived here, except steph went away for a year, so we kind of all lost touch with her leaving but went on. Year two at bcm is the year i was suppose to start setting an example and meeting all the new freshman and reaching out to them. Well as this began, relationships popped up and certainly split our group apart. as alaways its hard to make time like you once did for your guy friends once you get a g/f. At this point most of us had those. But as year two approcahced i gained so many new friendships. I began to get really close to Greg because we'd get bored and just hang out. Endless nights of random funness like year one but with different poeple...Lainey, Qynn, molly, john, shelley, greg. At this point none of these coulpes were together, so we all stayed out late just bent on having friendships and fun. ONce again stayed out late. Time went on after so many memories and then relationsihps popped up once again...lainey and qynn and john and shelley, and then also chris blystone started to hang out with us. Which added tons more fun to the group..time goes on ....blystone ends up with molly, and now im stuck in that group without someone to have my own because i hads broken up with my g/f awhile back.

So we all hang out, grow some great bonds..as i fall futher away from matt and shadrach. Time goes on, and eventually. Me, delisle, and blystone get an apartment together. WHich was okay for the first few months and then me and blystone grew closer to gether while basically delisle and shelley did there own thing. It was during this time that i had started to date amber and the four of us..m and c. and me and amber got really close. We all hung out and have so many memores i will never forget....Ichthus, HOliday worlds, ceder point, colts game, me and blystone watched every colts game of 07 together, tons of fun just all out. Mean while couples begin to get engaged. matt and spring, qynn and lainey, john and shelley(which by this time no one was talking to them because it was yeah well you know), me and amber, and so forth....and finally molly and chris!

then that brings us to today...we all are in our own relationships..half of us married or so to be. (myself happily married to the most amazing wife ever..Amber...)And im just sitting here wondering what is in store. i mean im looking into the immediate future and i just see working ...working...working...and not having that much money to show for it. To be honest i wish i could go back to my days of not having a job and just build those godly friendships, but i know i cant, that was all part of me growing up and being who i am today. I just miss it you know? i just miss not being an adult...Hanging out..making friends...not having a job so you can enjoy just the mere presence of someone so you can see GOd thru them so much that you know he is at work and it just makes you all happy inside. I miss the friendships ive made, a lot of them have come and gone. and will probably never be the same. Its harder now when you are all married and all working, its hard to find the time for each other. Even when we do get time all together it seems as if now we are in the back of our heads always having to worry about leaving at a certain time to make sure we get enough rest for work or whatever it may be. It just stinks. I miss the days of being with God's people who loved each other so much that you could breath and smell it or feel it. The days that on a "thirsty thursday" or instead of having a drinking party on friday nights we would hang out and just talk about life and joke around, sing worship songs on the guitar and sing.

Im a firm beleiver that GOd puts people in our lives just for a moment or for a lifetime maybe..but he does it for a reason. Now that shadrach doesnt live here..or Tufo doesnt live here....or joey doesnt live here..or corey doesnt live here...and quite honestly i dont know wheere ill be in a year or so. It doesnt matter those moments in life were there when they were suppose to be and for a reason. I just want everyone to know that you all did touch my life and i miss the moments we've had. and dang it we all need to hang out more often again..even if we are married and working full time jobs. =) Im always up for hanging out..if we plan parties like we use to ..ill even request off work. If im ever off work im always up for hanging out, my cell is always open..I do have a wife now so she might have to come, but she likes Godly friendships too :)

im off now..its getting late and this is too long as it is anyways..

Much Love,

J D Fizzle(now thats old school lol)

Walking Tall

2008-07-28T17:10:00.000-07:00

So me and the wife watched this movie tonight and it was really good. If you havent seen it yet and plan on it, then dont read further because i will probably ruin the just of the plot for you. Dont read on..if not..then read on..

The movie basically takes place in a real small town and the Rock is an army soldier returning home from being away for 10 years. Well a lot has changed and he realizes it right off the bat. Things have gone bad ...the biggest source of income use to be a mill that was founded with dignity and respect but now that has closed and the biggest place in town bringing all the money and helping it stay afloat..is basically a strip club casino where everyone is full of themselves and all in it for themselves. Well the name of the movie is walking tall and that is just what the rock does in the movie. He refuses that life style and doesnt stoop to that low of a level. Eventually he fights back and turns the town back around.

This Got me thinking just about how life has been for me lately and how stuff has changed in my life and i feel like nothing is left like it use to be. Im here still walking tall hoping that things will turn for better eventually. I mean i look back and 3 years ago i was just a kid..no responsibilites...No job, no car, but enjoying life to the fullest. STESS-FREE. Id wake up and go to school, play basketball 4 out of the 7 days a week, and if i wasnt playing basketball I was doing something that had to do with church. Bible study, worship practice, sunday school, mission projects. And this is when life for me was the most enjoyable. I saw God the most and it seemed like i had a group standing tall with me. Then I slowly became more responsible which led to getting a Job.

From that point on, paying for everything on my own...the stress has started. The stress of having to make bills, but still expected to do so much. Im still walking tall but it is hard when you seem to barely have the time to think. And im not complaining, but i am sitting back and looking at life. I mean i work 5 if not 6 days of the week and on my one day off i find it hard to roll out of bed to go to church and get involved again. Mainly because its changed for me, gone sour so to speak. Through all ive been through its hard to want to go to a place that seems not like what it use to be. But this movie inspired me to want to walk tall and bring back what was there. Because what was there is where i had all my joy. Stuff Changes but we dont have to blend in with the change...because not all changes are for the better. They say step out and take a chance, but if that chance clearly isnt working..there is no use in running it in the ground..get out!

I need to find a way to want to get involved again because at this point all the non-sense and stupidness in the last few months with me and God's people and his church really makes me not want to. I need to suck it up and deal with all of it, things can only get better anyways. Just need to walk tall.

Doggy Joy

2008-07-21T19:38:00.000-07:00

I took this picture of samson last week sometime. I am so happy that my wife had a doggy before we got hitched because then he became my doggy too. You know, he brings so much joy into life(other then when he pees or poops on the floor or when it comes time to walk him outside..lol) When life gets hard and difficult you look at him and he just cheers you up. He is so cute, he does some of the funniest things too. Like when you are sitting on the couch, if there is even a hint of dead space he will try to jump in between like you and the pillow because he thinks he can fit in there. He is overall just pleasant to have around. Sometimes i wish i could be like him though too. Think about it? You get up, cheer humans up when they are having a bad day, play with your toys, eat, drink, use the bathroom, rest through the day, and then go to sleep at night. If only life were that easy..lol. See me and the wife right now are in the midst of making some really hard choices, but the other day she said something that her dad stands by. When it comes to money, this place is not our home, its just money. Its really true though, i mean i know the sermon that God wants us to take care of our money and everything ..i know i know, but really the worst part about money is it puts so much tension and stress on our lives. Our marriages. Our Lives. Our walks with God. Its not worth it really, honestly. I mean two months ago amber and I had things figured out, then bam she has no job. Its not really the finaces i have the problem with as much as some of the people and everything that is involved and how the situation was handled. But due to that situation now finances are tight. But i have had a lot of peace about things here recently, that it really doesnt matter God is in control and he will provide. Its hard to keep positve when literally EVERYTHING goes not like you expect it, or everything just keeps going wrong. Money is just paper, its temporary. You have it, and then its gone. God is permanent, even when your upset at things happening in life. And i have to re-realize that. We'll see what happens with everything. Do i think its fair that we have gone thru all of this, this early in our marriage or lives? No not at all, but we will get through this. Gods funds do not empty out just because things go wrong. I love samson, he always makes me want to be relaxed, and when im relax i can communicate with God.

Driving in circles

2008-07-14T19:17:00.000-07:00

Well here we are its been a few months since i last blogged and some huge changes for the better in life, but then some things just never change...

June 7th i got married to the most amazing, most beautiful, and the bestest friend you could ever ask for in Amber! She completes what i can't finish in my life, and i cannot ever live without her. Marriage has been a great experience and i am glad to have a wife i can come home to, that is so happy to cook dinner and take care of me. Amber takes care of me better than anyone else could ever imagine. I appericiate all that she has done and will do, I hope she never forgets how much i love her. She gets frustrated with me because i dont think i do as much as she expects me to do. Of course we got married on the day of the big flood. It just made me think about how no matter how much you think you have things in order...nothing is really set in stone. This is hard for me to swallow ill be honest because im the type of person that wants everything to be in order and figured out. I am having a hard time enjoying life lately just ebcause i feel as though nothing is settled or figured out. I feel like it will never be. And it is hard because you can't focus on God and what he wants for you when everything in your life is going every which way or just bad. I know thats a serom in itself that...in those times is when you seek god and find him. But i dont know...to me its kind of like been there done that and nothing still has happened. I mean here we are married enjoying that part of life, but amber is without of a job due to one of the worst handled situations ive ever seen in my entire life. And i dont make enough to pay off our student loans and all that jazz. So what do you do? I dont know. WHich that ticks me off all in itself because here i do bust my butt, getting paid half of what i should, but yet now i can't even afford to get to work because of gas and cost of living. Its ridiculous. And as far as going back to school to get a degree? Because i know thats whats everyone is thinking. But my question is why? Here amber has a four year bachelors degree, and can't find a job and we are stuck paying the loans back that she had to take out to get a degree...what was the point of that again? I mean if she can't get a job with a degree why even bother you know? I am not by no means dissing on my wife, I give her props for getting a degree, but the way this world is run is like it doesnt even matter that she has a degree..

I have decided that we just have teh worst luck with things in general, and eventually things have to go up, but the question is when and how long will it be like this? Its hard to keep the joy with God when life seems to be a giant screwjob, and its the same thing over and over again.

Downfall of the World: People (Long Blog)

2008-05-25T10:12:00.000-07:00

Man i do not have the time to blog at all, oh well. Anyways, a lot of things have changed in my life in the last few weeks, as will in the next few weeks, but one thing has dawned on me. I absolultely cannot stand the human race. This is sad because if anyone knows me knows that in highschool and my years of college that i attended, that i was probably the most social guy you could find. I always wanted to hang out with people 24/7. You know why? It was because in each and every person i had found God speaking to me and working through all of our conversations. But now i can very rarely hear God or even see God working thru the human race because the human race is pathetic. Am I perfect? No. Do i make mistakes or answer things wrongly? Yes. But i really can't stand people. In the last probably year I have seen several Christians not act the way that God wants us to act, and i feel like either a) its with blatant disregard and they aren't knowing what they are doing or b) they do know what they are doing and they continue to deal with things the way they are just because they selfish and foolish. You see i have been in a slide as far as me and God go for quite some time. I still pray and talk and as for forgiveness, but what is happening is since i am see people acting foolish and not care to do the right thing or act how God wants us to act, it has been hard to see God in conversations and see God at work. So im struggling, because im so tired of organized religion. I did not grow up in the church at all, but i have been going to church since like 1998 or so. Every single church....starts off good. You meet people that have similar beliefs, with similar goals. But every single church i have been do...something happens and either the church splits or something has changed within the church. Also at the bigger churches ive gone too ive noticed the bigger the congregation the more the church turns into a business or into politics. It starts to become "lets protect our name so we can stay big". Its in those big churches that you have to start worrying about money to pay more employees, with more employees its hard to have a Godly Council. I know God wants his church to be the biggest and God wants his church to grow, but how are we going to grow when we cant handle who attends there? If you can't keep a bible study group from throwing gossip around then what reasoning should you have in trying to add more people to be hurt to that group. Shouldn't you work on fixing the group? I don't know i am totally fed up with Christians. Church is a community where you should be able to go to all help each other grow closer to God and be with others who have the similiar belief system as you. It should not be a place where you gossip, or not accept one another. God doesnt want us to have to be a perfect person to attend church i know this, but still even an NONCHRISTIAN would know its just not right to start a rumor about someone from a moral stand point. This last year has been bad on me as far as this aspect on my walk with God but on another side of the view this last year has shown me what non-believers may think of how stupid christians and how hypocritical christians can be. I am just fed up with people. I work at a place where i talk about the same products, deal with really angry customers. Then I clock out and even driving on the road...some people make some made driving decisions. Playing Videogames on xbox live, people get way to prideful..its just a game gosh, quit running your mouth. Then of course, God's people being foolish. Im fed up with organized religion, people, and just everything right now. One thing im not fed up with though is God. I love him with all my heart and i know he is still that same loving father that i fell in love with 4 years ago. I will never let that go. Besides if i didnt have him, what would there be to live for?

People are so selfish nowadays. If there is something good that is going to be there in it for them, then they will do anything. Vice Versa if there aint nothing good for you then why bother right? PLEASE! what ever happened to putting others before your self????? At work i try to help out in areas im not even required to just because. But at work, we have a tv department and we have the rest of the store departments. The tv guys dont seem to want to help anyone unless it concerns a tv. So while us computer, roadshop, and merch people are busting our butts they stand around ont he internet then you ask for there help , they say "im tv guy only"......On Halo people only want to play games they want to play....i help them rank up....stay up til like 4 several nights and go to work tired for the purpose of helping them rank up...then they say yeah ill do the same for you...3 months later...nothing....once again if theres nothing there for you then why help right? I am so sick in tired of people being so selfish, it makes me want to revert back to my old ways and look out for myself first and not care about others. God doesnt want me to do that but I just keep getting hurt over and over again and ive tried and tried. But when you are the only person at the work place with that others first attitude....its hard it beats you up. And i am not perfect i screw up but i know one thing i try really hard to strive to do is put others before myself. Now when im tired or worked 6 days in a row or something yeah, i may be selfish and not help someone but I try to always put people before me. Amber can attest to this , she knows me and knows i do. and this is what God wants us to do.

I'm not saying that i am perfect, not the point of this blog. I make mistakes and i screw up. I know people will sin and screw up, but we need to stop. this is what god envision his church to be. We need to be screwups that help each other thru God's love and grace. We shouldn't be screwups that screw each other up even more.

God..help me to love people like i once did, im called to do that, but why did you make us so selfish and foolish.

God's Will or My Will?

2008-04-22T23:09:00.000-07:00

Will-tacular!

What exactly is God's will any way? Is it that i mission out to africa and help others. Or is it simple just be a good husband and father to my family. Can i ever know what God wants me to do, or am i going to spend the rest of my life wandering in a dark room with my hands in front of me trying to feel a wall to know where i am at. I feel like thats how i am lately. Like someone has shut off the lights and I have my hands in front of me looking for a safe place but with very little guidance. I try to do everything myself instead of asking someone to just turn the lights back on. Will we ever really know what God wants us to do or do we just spend time doing what we know makes us feel good or happy. Its so hard to discern what God wants but yet so easy to know exactly what the heck i want. I mean obviously God wants us to talk to him and pray to him. Meditate on him all thru-out the day, but beyond that it never clearly says in the bible that Jon Furry Shall be a Telemarketer that sells used tissues and will make a millions but donate most of it to missions work. Obviously i went crazy with that, but quite honestly...that could be God's Will and i dont even know it yet. Oh and another brainbuster, just because things happen the way they do doesn't always mean that it was God's will. Most things are God's will, but there are somethings that were/are caused by a man's free will. Throw that into the mix and what do you have? A whole bunch of confusion. The reason i am thinking about all this and actually bloggin about it, is i want to obviously follow God's will and i have a job oppurtunity with a little bit of a raise that will get me out of Circuit City, but i don't know if God wants to lead me there or not. Vice versa i dont know if i am wanting to be selfish to take the job and leave behind what i have done at ccity. Or am i being set in my ways and not allowing God to change something in my life. Is it God's will to go to this new job, or is it his will to have me stay at ccity. I have not the slightest clue, and for the first time in my life i will have to say this is one of the biggest/toughest decisions i have ever had to make. Its in times like these that you wish God had the Book of Jon Furry out on the table and you could read word for word what he wants me to do in this lifetime. But then again if he had the story written out for me to act whats the point in giving me the choice to choose his way or my way? Just a some food for thought, its 2:30 AM and i am tired and confused at life right now.

Re-emerging

2008-04-08T19:15:00.001-07:00

Well after several few weeks of my beautiful soon to be wife has been bugging me to get a blog, i have caved in and found one. From what i can see though this will be sweet. I remember i use to use blogs so much to help make me stay focused with thoughts and with God. It really helps, so we'll see where we go from here. But for now thats all I got though. Good bye myspace...hello blogspot!

J Dog Out